so I went to my specialist appointment in Hamilton yesterday. We left here at 12:30 and didn't get back until almost 8pm, which was nuts! OPT was to blame for that one. My appointment was 2 hours long and ery in-depth. I spoke with the doctor for about 90mins then she invited Greg in to ask him some more questions. Finally, when the interview was finished she asked me if I wanted to know her two cents, and we said of course!
Bi-polar. She thinks I'm manic-depressive. Interesting. This diagnosis came through me telling her about some "highs" that I've had in my life, along with the very obvious "downs". She suggested coming off ALL my current medication and starting on lithium. She said if the lithium doesn't work then we can look into ECT a bit more closely, but this is the first course of action. I don't really know what I thought of her opinion...like I agreed but disagreed at the same time. I was anxious to hear Dr.Asti's side of things today.
So, I met with Dr.Asti this morning and she said she also feels that this diagnosis is "interesting but not out of the question". Whenever there is a woman that has given birth, and has treatment-resistant depression, then a diagnosis of bi-polar is suspect.However, I do have have the typical mania that you would witness with someone who has this disorder. She also told me that treatment resistant depression is commonly treated with lithium, so it is not only used in the case of bi-polar. As for the doctor recommending that I stop all other medications, Dr.Asti and I felt that that isn't the right option for me right now, considering that my depression is so deep.She told me that lithium is processed by the kidney's instead of the liver, meaning that this medication will work indepedently of the other's I'm on. The only downside of this is, if I start to feel better then I won't know if it is the antidpressants/psychotics that I'm taking, or the lithium. But that is a risk I'm willing to take because continuing on all medications means that I'm covering all my bases.
So there it is, that's where I stand right now...lithium starting tonight and she said it will take a week to get into my system. We shall see how that goes, if at all. Other than the appointment I am feeling OK... don't get to see Adelyn today, but I will see her tomorrow for (no more than) and hour and a half (but I'm still looking forward to it!). I'm continually trying to stay positive,knowing that I will be here for another few weeks ...so hard to imagine right now, but this is what I have to do.
Hope everyone had a great start to their week,
Amanda
Amanda, I'm just catching up today.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you have a plan and I hope the Lithium helps you. I know everyone has probably told you this many times before, but you have to stop being so hard on yourself. Right now, 1 hour with Adelyn is enough for you and you should not feel bad about that. Take it one step at a time. Take time to heal and find yourself before you start worrying about being a good mom. It sounds like things are starting to look more up than down, and I sincerely hope they continue on that trend. You may falter, but I hope you can continue to climb your way out of this. Lots of love.